She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
