Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Randomize