You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
