This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
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