It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
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