...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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