but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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