I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
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