What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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