Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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