I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
