his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
