East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
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