May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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