Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Randomize
