This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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