Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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