Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize