There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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