Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
