you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
