:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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