He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
