Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
