So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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