I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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