We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
