Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
