i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
We need to rekindle our bromance
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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