i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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