Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
