what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
