I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
