Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
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