He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
