Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
