dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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