i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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