My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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