last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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