Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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