I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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