I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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