Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
