we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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