Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
More tranny stories later!
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Randomize
