so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
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MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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