do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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