and you said cock pushups were impossible
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
