do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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