I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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