It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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